he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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