Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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