It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
