Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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