I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
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