then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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