sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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