im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Just invented taco cereal.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
