I must be too annoying 4 u.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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