No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
