..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
