I skipped work to stalk him.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Randomize
