at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
