Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
