I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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