Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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