Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I love having hate sex.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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