so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
