is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
