I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
