dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
MIDGETS
????
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
