he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I want her autograph on my taint
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
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