Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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