It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Randomize
