at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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