I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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