Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
