take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
