Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I cannot find my penis.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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