YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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