I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
no you cant smoke seaweed
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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