How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
