No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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