The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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