im gay
i know
yea but for you.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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