her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
