That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
