More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
