There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize