tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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