idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
