hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
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