3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
