i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
