He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
