ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
