So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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