Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
