He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
