walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
